Over the last two weeks friends and acquaintances have once again broached the subject of online dating. Wondering out loud why they did it, what has the world come to, and all the time hoping that this might just be the answer for them. Well… My wonderful Valentine is my husband, Ron L. Welsh.
Who wouldn’t love this face?
And yes, as you can guess from the title of this post, I met him online at Match.com. Here’s my story in a nutshell… I had been single for 19 years, and had moved around a lot, from Minneapolis, back to my hometown-NYC, to Chicago, and finally here to Northern California…where I knew no one. I landed in the small town of Bodega on the Sonoma County Coastline, population 176 (and no, that is not a typo). Okay, OKAY! This could be considered extreme by some, but in hindsight, it was the best thing I ever did. After about two years of adapting and growing to love it here I found myself sitting on top of the 10 acres I called home; by myself, drinking a glass of wine and eating microwave popcorn for dinner while watching a rental video…again. I realized that I had to do something to meet people. Oh, ok, to meet a man. AND, I was torn because I really loved living alone and I truly loved my life. Really. But, in my heart I knew it was the right time in my life for relationship and commitment. And so, with little alternative out in the hinterlands, and with much anticipation, I went to my dial up computer and joined match. Four months later I met Ron! That was 7 years ago this April.
our wedding portrait-click on the picture to see where we were married!
Today I say he is the best thing that ever happened to me. Our relationship is easy. He is my rock, my biggest supporter, and the happiest person I’ve ever met. Self confident, warm, gentle, and a real guy; he is simply…a good man. While I don’t believe that everyone wants or needs to be with someone in relationship, I do think that if you really want to, it’s definitely possible. Here’s what worked for me with online dating: 1) make sure that meeting someone is really what you want, in your heart and soul. After all it’s all about intention, right? 2) Be real on line. And be direct about what you want. I was clear that I wasn’t interested in “dating” but rather meeting someone I truly wanted to spend time with. I think that helped me edit out those not interested in the same thing. 3) I treated everyone with respect, whether I was interested or not. After all, we are all there for the same reason, to love and be loved in return!
The creative spark of LOVE is what makes the world go around-image via “love and inspiration” on FB
4) I was really picky. If an email turned me off or felt funny, for what ever reason, I simply said “at this point in my life I trusted my gut and while you look like a great person, I don’t feel we have much in common”. And then I wished him luck in his search. 5) I only met up with someone casually for coffee or a hike. And, only if I really felt like there might be something to this person that interested me. In 4 months I only met 6 men in person. They were all intelligent, well educated, well traveled, attractive men. I was actually impressed with the quality of the men I met. But I wasn’t interested in quantity, but rather that one perfect man for me. : ) 6) I never went out a second time if I wasn’t interested in knowing more. 7) And yes, I believed that once I committed to meeting someone, and made my effort by going on line that he could appear from anywhere. So, I was open! Those of you who know me know, I’m a big proponent of meeting people online. Now on Facebook and twitter I’ve met the most amazing women and men both online and a few in person who are becoming good friends. So, if you are single and do want to meet someone special, I say…give it a try. There is a site for everyone! Go for it, and good luck. To my friends in relationship and those who are not, I am reminded that each and everyone of you is special to me. It’s always a little bit of beauty™ to love and to be loved in return, is it not?
This Valentine’s Day I wish you love…and not just today, but everyday of your life!
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20 Comments
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Thanks so much for sharing this! I love your love story! I’m not quiet ready for this yet, but you give me great hope that someday I may find someone to spend time with and that we enjoy each other’s company! See you soon in LA!
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Oh, so sad that I won’t be going to LA this year. Please keep us up to date on what is happening there.
As for meeting someone, when and if you are ready, I’m sure you WILL find someone. Take care Kelley, and thanks for stopping by and also, always great to see you on pinterest!
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Such a wonderful story Irene. You are not the only person I have known that has recommended and betrothed a connection online. You are so right also how important it is to be respectful even if you are not interested. I hope one day I will have a wonderful story such as this to tell. I have a motto for myself, tell me what you think. It is from a poem I wrote. “Only a heart that’s true and kind is worthy of this heart of mine!”
May your day be surrounded by love and reminders of how special each of you are. God Bless, and wishing you a wonderful Valentines Day.
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I love the quote from your poem Leslie, would love to see the whole thing…and yes, you do deserve a true heart for sure!
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My sister met her husband on an on-line service for big beautiful women. There is an appropriate site for everyone. I can’t even tell you how many of my clients have met true love this way. It’s what’s happening… and it’s a beautiful thing, baby. Happy Valentine’s Day to you and Ron, Irene.
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Thanks Alexandra! and yes, it truly is a beautiful thing as to how the Universe is always adapting to what we humans can create, is it not? One way or another they send it to us…and it doesn’t really matter how, does it?
Happy Valentine’s day to you too.
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My favorite love story ever. Happy (now a tad belated) Valentine’s to you and Ron, Irene.
I miss you two.-
Ahhhh Hilton. miss you too. Really busy day today, let’s try to talk tomorrow?
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Wow Darling, that was really beautiful. April 23 will be our seventh Wedding Anniversary and we have know each other nine years this coming Thanksgiving. I give thanks for having you in my life everyday. Thank you for everything you do for me and all that you have added to my life. I love you, RonL
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This is a really great story, congratulations on your happiness! You are reinforcing what I have heard before about online dating. You have to have the right attitude if you want to make it work, just like you did. Like most things, you get out of it what you put into it, so if you are looking for a serious relationship you shouldn’t just jump all over whatever dates they suggest. Instead be picky like you suggest. thanks for sharing your firsthand experience, it’s a great testimonial for the success to be found with online dating.
~Michelle
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This is a most beautiful love story, orchestrated from the beginning by a desire to share your life with a man who truly loves you , and you, the same for him–I wish I knew you better so that I could comment fully as an old friend would do–
I have been married to my husband for 31 years and it is a good one and i am wishing you and your husband many happy years together!!
Lyn
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